No Attachment, No Stress

Attachments in Life

We all have attachments in life. Letting go is the readiness and willingness to let go of all attachments in life. The following are some of the most common attachments:

Attachment to the ego-self

Attachment to the ego-self is the most difficult to let go of, given that conventional wisdom focuses so much on “self,” such as the emphasis on the importance of “self-esteem,” that we become not only “self-conscious” but also “self-centered.”

Attachment to material things

The mind identifies with material possessions to create the ego-self. Many of us identify ourselves with a certain social status when we belong to a certain social group or drive a certain luxury car.

Thinking questions

Why am I driving a Mercedes?

Is it really better than a Toyota?

Attachment to time

Many of us think that time is precious, and wish that we had more than 24 hours a day. We no longer have the time to appreciate the beauty of nature, because we have become overwhelmed by our daily problems and the time needed to solve them. Indeed, many of us are forever time-stressed.

Attachment to time means the reluctance to live in the present moment. Unfortunately, the present moment is the only reality in life, and the only moment during which one can objectively validate past thoughts and future projections that continuously filter through the subconscious mind, enticing it to form identities—which become the components of the ego-self.

According to the wisdom of Tao, attachments are the sources of human pain and suffering.

“Fame or self: Which matters more?

Self or wealth: Which is more precious?

Gain or loss: Which is more painful?

He who is attached to things will suffer much.

He who saves will suffer heavy loss.

A contented man is never disappointed.

He who knows when to stop does not find himself in trouble.

He will stay forever safe.”

(Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching, Chapter 44)

Attachments to the material world are the sources of human miseries and unhappiness, because they seldom become realities and they generate only desire and control that ultimately create a vicious circle of miseries and unhappiness.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

The Relationship Human Wisdom and Biblical Wisdom

Without human wisdom, the Word of God alone would be unintelligible to many, just as those seeds falling on the wayside and becoming unfruitful in Jesus’ parable of sowing seeds.

“When anyone hears the word of the kingdom, and does not understand it, then the wicked one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is he who received seed by the wayside. But he who received the seed on stony places, this is he who hears the word and immediately receives it with joy; yet he has no root in himself, but endures only for a while. For when tribulation or persecution arises because of the word, immediately he stumbles. Now he who received seed among the thorns is he who hears the word, and the cares of this world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and he becomes unfruitful.” (Matthew 13:19-22)

Despite the exposure to Biblical wisdom, many would, indeed, fulfill the prophecy of Isaiah:

“And in them the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled, which says:

‘Hearing you will hear and shall not understand,

And seeing you will see and not perceive;

For the hearts of this people have grown dull

Their ears are hard of hearing,

And their eyes they have closed,

Lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears,

Lest they should understand with their hearts and turn,

So that I should heal them.’” (Matthew 13:14-15)

In addition, man has developed the pre-conditioned thinking of resistance to change: most of us prefer to remain in our comfort zones. As a result, many not only are biased against, but also have strong resistance to, reading the Bible, thinking that the Bible would make them drastically change their lifestyles, requiring them to relinquish the things they cling to dearly in their lives. Due to the pre-conditioned thinking and inherent resistance to change, they walk away from the pathway to spiritual wisdom.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

The Wisdom of Anything Is Everything

The Wisdom of Anything Is Everything

Awareness of your own responsibility for humanity may enable you to rein in your temper and inhibit your anger. Better understanding of humanity lets you acknowledge the destructive forces of anger, and thereby instrumental in reducing their strength. Your short temper can benefit from Tao wisdom, which shows you the importance and necessity of embracing all—the easy and the difficult, as well as the pleasant and the unpleasant. In life, difficult and unpleasant experiences not only train but also enhance you mental stability to control your temper, which often undermines your compassion for others. Tao wisdom teaches you not to pick and choose but to embrace anything and everything in life because any situation in life can make you become either a teacher or a student. Life is about anything and everything that you can learn from, and this is where true wisdom comes from.

Understanding that anything is everything may also make you see things very differently. People and things do not exist independently. When there is long, there has to be short; they do not exist simply because of their own nature. Everything in life is not only relative but also related. Viewing any life situation—whether it is good or bad—with this profound human wisdom may help you see that anything is everything, In other words, any life situation is not under its own power but depends on many present causes and conditions, as well as many past causes and conditions; otherwise it could not have come into being. With this perspective, you can see much more of the whole picture, and thus you can see the reality of the situation.

For instance, in economics, if you just go after profit, you may end up with corruption. Failure to look at the whole picture that anything is everything means your failure to see the reality of everything in life. Failure to see the reality means your outlook becomes distorted and exaggerated, and thus leading to inappropriate actions or reactions. To illustrate, if a person or an event causes anger and hatred, the ugliness of anger and hatred is often exaggerated when the whole picture of the reality is not seen. An unreal mental projection of the exaggerated ugliness of anger and hatred may result in disproportionate actions or reactions that result in unhappiness.

Always look at self and others from the whole perspective that anything is everything, and you may become a better and happier you.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

The Paradox of Life and Living

“The Way is paradoxical.

Like water, soft and yielding,

yet it overcomes the hard and the rigid.

Stiffness and stubbornness cause much suffering.

We all intuitively know

that flexibility and tenderness

are the Way to go.

Yet our conditioned mind

tells us to go the other way. ”

(Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching, chapter 78)

TAO wisdom tell us to do these: accepting all that is simple and humble; embracing the good fortune and the misfortune. According to Lao Tzu, this is how we become masters of every situation, and thus we overcome the painful and the difficult in our lives.

But the reality is: can we do that? That is why the Way is always paradoxical.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Believing in Spirituality

Believing in Spirituality

Believing in spirituality may give you the miracle of becoming and transforming, giving you the happiness wisdom..

At some point in your life, especially as you continue to age, you may begin to sense your incompleteness, your loneliness, your limitations, your disillusions with human vanity, and you may then begin to long for someone or something that can truly fill and satisfy you, or your inner longing. In your youth, you might have turned to the physical world to gratify your needs and wants, such as successful careers, material comforts, and satisfying relationships, among others. At some point in your life, however, you may suddenly realize that your past wayward pursuits were all in vain—much like “chasing after the wind” (Ecclesiastes 2, 11)—and that you have deviated from your conscience and distanced yourself from spirituality or your Creator.

Believing in spirituality may enhance your consciousness of your own true self with the deep desire to become wholesome again. Becoming is a miracle of transforming your whole being, making you happier.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Relaxation Is Anti-Aging

Relaxation is anti-aging and holds the key to longevity living. Advancement of medical science has extended human longevity, but modern living has, ironically enough, shortened lifespan. That is to say, humans could have an even much longer lifespan if it were not for the compulsive living in contemporary world. Yes, many of us are living in a pressure cooker that demands most of our time. We wish we had more than 24 hours, but we don't. As a result, we become time-stressed.

Many of us are living in the past or in the future, except in the present. Depression is one of the rampant disorders in contemporary society. People with this mental disorder are often held hostage to their unhappy past, or worries of their future. Depressed people do not live in the present. Those who are time-stressed, do not live in the present, because their minds are forever preoccupied with what will happen in the future. If you talk on the phone while driving, you are one of those time-stressed individuals.

If you are stressed by the past or the future, you are not living in the present. Only those who living in the present live a longer and happier life. To do just that, you need Tao wisdom.

Tao wisdom is based on "Tao Te Ching," which is an ancient classic from China. The book was written thousands of years ago by Lao Tzu, a sage with all white hair (a sign of wisdom). According to the legend, the great philosopher was forced to put down his profound wisdom in writing before he was permitted to leave China for Tibet. Reluctantly, Lao Tzu concisely and succinctly expressed his unique wisdom in eighty-one short chapters with only five thousand words all told. 

As a testament to the significance and timelessness of his eternal wisdom, "Tao Te Ching" has been translated into many languages; as a matter of fact, this ancient classic has become one of the most translated works of world literature.

Tao wisdom in living is to have no ego-self so that you can live in the present. With no ego-self, there is no expectation; with no expectation, you become non-judgmental, which is accepting and embracing the desirable as well as the undesirable in life; with non-judgmental, you appreciate non-doing; with non-doing, you can live in the present and in harmony with nature. So, Tao recommends no ego-self to live a no-stress life with no worry, no expectation, no judgment, and no-overdoing. 

Tao  wisdom is the essence in the art of living well. Tao wisdom is simple but controversial, profound and yet intriguing. Click here to find out more about the essentials of Tao wisdom.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Living in the Now

Daily living wisdom is living in the now, not the past. Yes, we all have a past; some of us may have a pleasant one, while others a less pleasant one. No matter what, the past was gone, and no longer real, except the memory of it. Only the present is real, and that is why it is called "present" -- a gift or present from the Creator.

Letting go of the past may hold the key to living a stress-free life. It is the wisdom of living well in this day and age. In this material world, many of us believe that more is always better. Why do we want more? The explanation is simple: we tend to identify all material things with our ego: the car we drive, the house we live in, the clothes we wear, the career we have. But they are all in our minds, and they don't last. Knowing this ultimate truth, we still hold on to everything in our possession, refusing to let go. This is how we have created stress in our lives.

According to the ancient wisdom of Tao, which is the profound wisdom of Lao Tzu, the ancient sage from China, who was the author of the immortal classic Tao Te Ching, one of the most translated works in world literature, letting go begins with the mind first:

"Letting go is emptying the mundane,

to be filled with heavenly grace.

Blessed is he who has an empty mind.

He will be filled with knowledge and wisdom from the Creator.

Blessed is he who has no attachment to worldly things.

He will be compensated with heavenly riches.

Blessed is he who has no ego-self.

He will be rewarded with humility to connect with the Creator.

Blessed is he who has no judgment of self and others.

He will find contentment and empathy in everyone.

Letting go of everything is the Way to the Creator."

(Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching, Chapter 9)s

To find out more about the essentials of Tao wisdom, click here.

Life is about mind over matter. To fully harness your mind power, first of all, you need to fully understand the role of the mind and how your mind works, so that it may work for you, instead of against you; and then learn the strategies to fully utilize your mind power. You think and your thoughts become the raw materials with which you weave the fabrics of your life, including your choices and decisions, your actions and reactions; your thinking is based on your perceptions of your past experiences, and the memories of those experiences.

According to Lao Tzu, an empty mind means you let go of all your memories that are responsible for inflating your ego. Without your ego, you have no stress.

Stephen Lau 

Copyright© by Stephen Lau