Happiness is only an abstraction, a far-fetched
thought that is often elusive and evasive; it is difficult not only to define
but also to understand. To further the complication, happiness often creates certain
misleading myths.
The
myth: the happiness sources
It is always a myth that abundant wealth,
good health, and satisfying relationships—what most people crave
and pursue in their lives—will bring them happiness. Abundant wealth, good
health, and satisfying relationships are only the byproducts of
happiness; they do not cause or bring true and lasting happiness in real life.
To illustrate, many lottery winners attest to
their experiences of temporary ecstatic happiness, and nearly all winners
confess that their winning has ultimately made them miserable and unhappy for
various reasons. Maybe once the initial stimulus of sudden wealth and the
drastic changes of lifestyle have worn off, they ultimately return to their
original baseline level of happiness or unhappiness. Or, maybe, according to
some experts, having too much pleasure—what is known as “eustress”—could also
cause stress, just as lacking in pleasure might be stressful to the many
have-nots.
The myth: the happiness effort
It is also a myth that happiness is something
that can be pursued with willpower and effort. The Bible rightly says that
pursuing happiness is just “like chasing the wind.” (Ecclesiastes 2:11)
Effort does not necessarily bring happiness; it
only creates the illusion of an environment that is conducive to
temporary happiness. To illustrate, one may work diligently in one’s career to
excel and to get to the top of the profession only to find that one has a
terminal illness, or has incurred a debilitating accident. For example, Steve Job, the co-founder of Apple
computers, had his life cut short by pancreatic cancer at the height of his
successful business career.
Pursuing happiness may be only a fantasy fueled
by temporary moments of happiness, because aging, illnesses, misfortunes, and
ultimately death plague all alike; in other words, impermanence cuts
short all human efforts and endeavors to bring happiness. We are all aware of
the fact that impermanence is an ultimate leveler of everybody and everything,
but many of us still choose to delude ourselves into thinking otherwise. Denial
only fosters the myth that if there is a will there must be a way to attaining
happiness, and that all it requires is the human effort to make any dream come
true.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
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