Control and Out of
Control
Letting go is difficult because there is one thing that most
of us have overlooked: the wisdom of letting go to let God.
Life is all about living—it comes with some hard
work, simple integrity, and, above all, the wisdom in living. If life is all
about living—not just about making and spending money—then it is not about
regrets and dreams.
Regrets look back at the past; dreams look forward to the
future. Unfortunately, both are not within our control. If the value
of money is solely based on accumulation of wealth, or the acquisition of
material things, then living indeed becomes a labyrinth of regrets and
dreams—regrets over the wrong investment decisions in the past, and dreams of
the great fortune yet to come in the future.
A life journey is forever
paved with many challenges and losses, many of which are beyond human control
because they are often sudden and unpredictable.
Physical loss, including
loss of vision and mobility, both of which may affect the quality of life with
respect to independent living, may make living beyond control.
Material loss may include
loss of property from natural disaster, such as flooding, tornado, and
wildfire, loss of place and space, such as moving from a house to an apartment
or to a nursing home. Downsizing also means the loss or forced disposal of
treasured possessions that many are reluctant to let go of.
Memory loss may result in a
severe loss of organizational ability and the ability to plan and function,
resulting in loss of independence, which is a major setback for the elderly.
Loss of loved ones due to
accidents or natural causes are devastating. Spousal loss is often the most
devastating in that the oneness in marriage is forever broken, resulting in
isolation and loneliness.
Losses that come in many
different forms often become sources of unhappiness, but losses are no more
than life challenges that are beyond human control.
But living, to many, is
about controlling self and others; more specifically, purposely controlling the
destiny of self, as well as directly or indirectly controlling the destinies of
others around. The truth of the matter is that we are only humans, and we
cannot control what is controlled by God. Being finite, with only limited
intelligence, we are limited in our capability to control what is beyond human
control. God, who is infinite, is in absolute control of everything. Our
constant desire to control is displeasing to God—an expression of our lack of
trust, and our disobedience.
Humans are always given a
choice: continuing to control one’s destiny, or letting go to let God
control.
God has given each one of
us a unique life and destiny that only we can complete it.
“Your eyes saw my unformed
body;
all the days
ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”
(Psalm 139: 16)
However, the completion of
that life and destiny in our life journey is according to His way and time, and
not according to ours. In other words, it is all about what He wants for us,
and not what we want for ourselves.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
